My life is a mess - Feel like a failure?

You have a big down on yourself and whilst you hang on to that,you will feel no better..Set yourself a target..From what you say,i suspect it's the extra weight which is causing you to feel way you do so work on that..There is hope as you want to be a police officer,work for it..When you put some plans in motion you'll be surprised how much better you feel..As for friends,they're mostly over rated but who wants to seek the company of a full time misery guts ? Think about it..Good luck..............